...ouch

Ho-hum.

I'm getting better. Not by much, mind. Just a little bit. My sore throat is killing me, but at least the toilet ceased to be a torture chamber.

And tomorrow I shall begin working. I'm already dreading it. I hope it's not as scary as I think it will be. Whine.

And yes, I would write more, but I'm dead tired.

Feel the pain

I signed the papers today, I'm officially a gal with a job. I'll be a slave of customer care again, but they'll pay me. For now this will have to do.

Why don't I care at the moment?

I guess it has to do with the fact that I have barely slept 3 hours, am peeing blood and I spent today signing papers, afraid that I would have to run to the toilet to my utter humiliation (luckily I found some meds and took them and they made it a little bit less unbearable), and then I spent the rest of my day (one of my 3 last free days!!!) at the doc, trying to pee into a little glass tube.

Since I'm not a guy and because of my illness I could hardly get any in. And they made me re-pee into another tube again. And again. It was a smelly, dirty bathroom and it hurt to pee (again, side effect of the illness) and I seriously wanted to do other stuff while I could. No luck.

So I come home and my mom calls and tells me I'm not sick, I will go and work on the 1st of April without any problems and so and so.

Have I mentioned that the glass tube I filled had its results already? My white cell count was high and other stuff were bad too because the nurse who gave me the results sent me back to the doc asap. So now I will have to fill another tube next Thursday and bring it to the doc, BEFORE work, EARLY FUCKING MORNING!!

But no, my mom tells me I'm not sick. So I'm having my nervous breakdown here, because apparently my folks don't care shit about me. Not even to say anything nice. No, my mom had to be patronizing and say I'm not sick at all. (Does she think I enjoy being sick? Does she think I love spending prefious free hours trying to piss into glass tubes when it causes me excruciating pain? Trust me, I don't want to be sick. I want to be healthy, enjoy the sunshine, go shop for the stuff I definitely will need and sleep while I can.)

And I just hate to be sick, hate to be tired, I hate to spend so much time at the doc where they think I have nothing else to do but retake tests, because my free time is theirs to spend. And I still haven't had a chance to buy shampoo (my bottle is empty), a 1 liter bottle for work to bring tea with and a little bag to keep my phone - and other stuff I do not want to get stolen - in at work.

Instead I will have to stay in bed tomorrow, take the meds and waste precious free time.

So what's so hard about saying "Yeah, this sucks, you have bad luck. You have every right to be hysterical. But don't worry, it'll be all right. You can take time off if you are sick, but you will heal by Thursday. Everything will be fine. Just take your meds, have a good night's rest and you will have time for yourself later. Not now, and I know this sucks, but you will. Everything will be fine."?

Because this is what I want to hear to calm down.

But nobody ever cares.

We don't sleep with George?

So... I got the Gray's Anatomy DVDs for someone I know, but before I pass them on I took a peek to see what all that excitement was about.

And I started watching Gray's Anatomy.

Yeah. Shame on me and all that. Yeah, I get it, let's move on.

So... The soap operaness is somewhat annoying after the first season, McDreamy is really not that attractive (I prefer Alex, tyvm), the blond underwear model is seriously getting on my nerves and honestly, the only person I really like is Christina, the cutthroat, sarcastic no-nonsense person.

Still... George is kind of cute. In the sweet, innocent cuddly puppy way. And I don't get it, why don't we sleep with George? I mean sure, I get it, he is not the macho guy or the hurt heartthrob (why is Shepherd a heartthrob again?), but he is of the caring sort who is cuddlesome and entertaining. Yeah, he prolly wouldn't be my first or second pick, but it's not a tragedy to sleep with him.

And he is kinda cute. And fluffy.

I'd sleep with George if I were there, no problem. These women are idiots. Sex is good. George is cute and enthusiastic. Do the math.

Illegal flower tribute

Seriously... this is so sick. (link to wiki about the illegal flower tribute)

*facepalm*

Why oh why didn't I hear about this before? This is seriously hilarious! (And sick too...)

...blergh

Job fairs are a mixed blessing. ...who am I kidding? I hated today!

Well, there are certain job fairs I hate, because somehow it's stuffy and the fair people (both the job seekers and the ones offering the jobs) are depressing me and making me feel like shit. Some are better. This one was of the ones that make my skin crawl.

Also, I'm starting to notice that if you go together with someone to a fair like this, rules are pretty much the same as going to a group blind date: only bring someone who's less pretty than you. Literally and figuratively speaking.

I mean sure, I can suffer through a guy ignoring me in favor of flirting with my friend, but it's frikkin annoying. Course the flirting doesn't matter, after all he is just a random guy out on the job fair and he is not the one who will be handling my application, but hell, it pisses me off like hell! I hate to be ignored and shrugged off, bite me. Who wouldn't be? But no thanks, I wouldn't want the flirting. He was fugly and made my skin crawl like crazy. Eugh.

And yes, I can understand why she's not shrugging him off, but why would my friend ask me to smile when this bloke has clearly no interest in me - and I feel like puking when I encounter a guy like this? Sure I could grin like a maniac, but that would lower my chances of getting a job. I'm sure he would remember a woman grinning like a maniac who only needs a butcher knife to turn into Dexter. So fuck this.

I guess I'm through with whining. I do realize you have to sell yourself, although I'm not sure why lying would help. But then again, anything goes.

Whatever. I've found a few places I am willing to send my applications in, and some I do NOT. Never say never, true, but as long as I have other options, no thanks.

So. Today's haul: vodafone mouse pad, phone hanger, key chain, a bunch of pens (one sparkly as in you hit it and light sparkles inside for half a minute or so, two pens with joysticky clicky parts, rest are simple ones) a beer opener (Becks) another key chain (also Becks), a magnetic bookmark, a box of play cards... I think this was all.

Yay me?

All I really want is a job, you know. But the sparkly and joysticky pens are kinda cool. ^^

Seriously? Seriously?!

I have been all over the city searching for some much needed Anchor perlé (sewing yarn), because the reseller said they sell Anchor perlé to this and this shop. (Ouch, my poor, achy feet! Now where is that warm pig belly?)

Well, let me tell you: they don't sell them there.

I had to settle for some Anchor non-perlé, thick and difficult to work with (because threads refuse to stick together), but it still beats the Puppets perlé with it's ridiculously fugly colours hands down. The Puppets perlé that every shop sells for some strange reason. Maybe it's cheaper? I mean sure it should be for being so fugly and useless.

Anyway, I'm done with my shopping (they tried to sell me DMC "perlé", which was floppy, soft and had washed out colours) and the shop's owner offers me an Anchor Calendar that costs a fortune and tells me I can buy it 30% cheaper if I buy 10 more Anchor err... yarn.

Now... anybody and their dog knows I have no use for calendars (and if I wanted any now in late March, I would buy an empty little booklet, number the pages after the months and days and be done with it, really). So I stare at him, baffled, wondering what the hell brought that on. I mean just because I make knotted bracelets out of perlé (yarn) it doesn't mean I need a calendar or even need a calendar with pictures of a certain yarn making company.

What the hell?

I told him politely that I'm done with my shopping, but thanks anyway.

But seriously... what the hell? I have at least 3 gadgets with in-built calendars at hand... why the fuck would I need a table calendar with yarn pictures???

Went to an interview (2nd round), will see how it went. If they call me back, they want me. If not... you know the drill.

Then went for a coffee with Eleanor and bought a top. Black. For spring/summer.

Then slept. I was wiped. I am never good when I have tow wake up early.

Then I watched Flashforward. And I am sad to report that the Asian guy is not so hot anymore. Nope, he is less and less interesting since the quantum physicist guy got more screen time.

Currently, the quantum physicist guy is my absolute fave, the lesbo girl comes second, anonymous alcoholic cop third (hey, he looks like he is finally developing a personality and backbone at last) and not-so-hot-anymore Asian guy is the 4th.

It's slightly worrying, that I'm starting to find blue eyed, blond guys with short, rumpled bed-hair cute. I blame Sark. No, I blame Anders. Or should it be Spike/Marsters? Or maybe Seifer Almasy? *sigh* Is it possible I like blond men just fine?!

small revelations

I have realized today why I'm not dating anybody right now and why I can't stand being in a relationship for more than 1-3 months.

It's not because I'm incapable of staying in relationships. I actually am capable of doing so. The problem isn't exactly on my end. The problem is much simpler and deeper than having commitment issues.

The problem is that I hate the personality of Hungarian men. I hate it that all they can do is whine and they do everything the roundabout way and they still don't get anywhere with anything (be it their lives or anything else). It's a Hungarian thing.

I mean hell, in America, even if they are raising idiots, they are raising self-sufficient idiots who can take care of themselves. I'm not saying they are brain-surgeons at the age of 18, but they can drive, do household chores... they have certain skills we simply lack. Why? Because we are raised to know all about history, ours and the world's, literature, maths, biology, chemistry, geography, physics, languages, etc. But we are not taught how to do everyday stuff or how to survive in this friggin country. At 18 we are still useless idiots while Americans, as uneducated as they are at 18, they still know how to survive in their country. And yes, this is why I can't stand the idea of dating a Hungarian. Ever.

That and the whole Hungarian mentality of only you matter, and that you lie, cheat, go the roundabout way, do anything to get out of paying taxes and generally can't be a decent human being. It doesn't matter if you kill the economy, because everybody else is doing too - so you will cheat, lie and steal too. But not just that. If someone else does better than you, you will hate that person. If you meet with a misfortune, you wish your neighbor would too, instead of wishing for your life to take a turn for the better. (And I'm sad to say I am Hungarian myself. I just want to escape from this horrid country.)

There is a joke about someone touring hell and seeing a couple of pits:
As a demon says, the first pit is where the Germans are kept under tight security, because if nobody looks at them for even a second, they would work together and get out in no time.
The second is where the British are kept, also under high security, because as the Germans, they would work together and escape were they not being watched 24/7.
The third pit, where the Hungarians are kept is not watched. Nobody cares what happens in the pit. Why? Because if any of them tries to get out, all the others would drag that one back down.

And I think this is why I can't date Hungarian guys. I can't stand them. I actually hate this bloody country. We need someone to clear out this pit and start again from scratch. And if someone tries the old tactics, that someone would be stuck in a rehabilitation center and kept there until they stop trying things the old way.

I went, I saw, I'm biased

I saw Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland.

*sigh*

It's more Through the Looking Glass than Alice in Wonderland. Yes, I do understand that nobody would have watched it under that title, but what about "Alice in Wonderland - Through the Looking Glass"?

Well. It was enjoyable. I'm not saying I'm giving it 10+... I'm gonna give it a 6,5-7... because of Johnny Depp. It is pretty... just vapid. But still an enjoyable watch for most. The visual effects rock.

So... the Hatter wasn't exactly unattractive. It was my first concern before watching it. But I'll talk about it later.

The visuals... rocked. (I watched it in 2D, since 3D looks blurry and makes me nauseous.) The characters looked awesome. But the Wonderland part...

I hated the barren look. It lacked every colour. I guess that was the intent, but I felt it was ugly and depressing. I wanted something pretty. The gnarly trees looked awesome though and well... it was ok, I guess. But the card soldiers... eugh. Fucking ugly. I expected something much prettier.

The queens both... pissed me off. The Red Queen... just the usual, I guess. Actually, she was much much more likable than the White Queen. I wished I could grab her head and smash it against a wall repeatedly until she stopped moving like that. Seriously, with those thick black eyebrows, thick black lipstick and her movements she looked like a transvestite. And where the hell were the White King and Knight? Not that I wanted to see any more trannies of course.

I guess I should read the book first before asking other, touchy questions like where were the other two queens?

So what did I miss? Emotions. Our Alice was all lukewarm. The only moment I liked her was when she decided to save the Hatter after all. Otherwise... she was sort of... empty. I mean she never showed emotions like crying or bitching... like people did in situations like hers. Also, there was no indication why she did what she did. Maybe I'm too used to books, but seriously, I've seen much better acting and much better plots than this.

The only saving grace was Johnny Depp. He completely stole the show. It should have been Mad Hatter in Wonderland. And I'm not even sure I liked him as Hatter. I like Depp, I like the characters he plays, and I like the Mad Hatter, but somehow these two together... I'm just not completely comfortable with the idea of a red headed Johnny Depp as the Mad Hatter.

Yes, I know that Hatters went bonkers because of Mercury poisoning and that their hair turned red, so the Mad Hatter ought to be a redhead, but... I liked white haired, snarky Reginald, the Disney World type Mad Hatter.

Oh well. This gothic, weird Mad Hatter was ok too. Just a bit weird, unexpected and different.

I just wish the ending would have been a bit... different.

Whenever you think you're safe...

I took this photo a few days ago when that huge snowstorm was afoot. Tell me, tell me it doesn't remind you of Silent Hill!

Catching up

Yesterday we had a snowstorm. Maybe that's why I dreamt about a huge storm wrecking our house, me being trapped in the hospital full of carcasses and crazy people (silent hill?) and then on my way home lightning striking and lasting for half a minute... Not my best dream, believe me.

My hair is getting noticeably longer. I have to quench the urge to chop it off time after time, again and again. So very annoying. Sadly, it's still at the stage where it'd look stupid if I tried to tie it up. I mean I like to do the simple bun: pull it back, twist and clip it. (See picture for more details.) Alas, sadly it's not long enough for that, only to annoy me to great lengths. :(

And it's cold. I hate the cold. Why is it, that it's already March already and it's still below zero? Of course I just got 2 potted plants for woman's day. So did my mom. So the desk is full of plants. Gimme my spring already!!! T_T

Strangers from distant lands...

Well, not really. But this sounds so much better... some LotR fans might even recognize it as a quote.

Anyway. We do not fall for the cute brothers from the Netherlands. We don't. They are way too young, way too cute and way too far away most of the time. Not to mention we don't have many things in common. And the younger one is definitely not my type anyway.

Still... how come if there are two brothers I always, without fail, prefer the older one? Is it because the older one is more grown up? They usually are... *sigh* (Note: this does not apply to twins. Or never asked if it does. Still... never tried so I have no evidence.)

Edit: yes, it does apply to twins, apparently.