About wellness spas and suchlikes

It is the holiday season, and I see more and more ads for "wellness treatments" as awesome Cristmast gifts. I never really considered that as a Christmas gift. I have seen women going to spas and lazing about, getting massages and generally just enjoying a 2 days one night trip to some awesome bathhouse in movies and TV shows, but I never really understood the appeal.

No, I'm lying. I really don't like the idea of it. I mean if anybody wanted to send me to some, I'd decline as politely as possible and keep my dirty words for myself... But really. I never enjoyed lazing about in a bath for half a day, or even running scantily clad to get a massage by some person I've never known. I'm pretty much put off by the whole "wellness trip" idea.

I dunno why exactly. I mean my whole body being ticklish might be one of the reasons. maybe not. I mean those women are always pretty and perfect and let's admit it, no matter how much I've accepted how I look, I'm still not comfortable traipsing around in a swimsuit where people can see me.

So I guess that is one of the main reasons. Women who look good can enjoy getting special treats and look good while they do it. I don't like to show my figure in public so it'd be a living hell for me.

Also, there is the question of "couldn't we spend it on something I like better?" Because I'd be more happy to get a pretty pendant or beads, even a nice shade of lipstick better than that spa treat.

Am I a bad person for disliking wellness treats in general and not being excited by sensual music, massages, nicely scented massage oils, candlelit baths and suchlikes?

(And yes, candlelit baths suck. For one the wax is a bitch to scrape up for another, you can hardly see unless you use up a ton of candles, you splash and they burn out and most of all: I prefer to shower. I wash myself properly and that's that, thanks very much.)

If I really had to pick some sensual overload, I'd pick a nice scented oil burning in my oil burner, jazz playing in the background and me curled up on the couch or the bed with a good book. (And don't forget my spicy tea, because that is vital too!)

So... yeah... that's me in a nutshell. I hate wellness spas and other crap. Sue me.