Doctor's visit. I had written a whole post at the mall while I waited for the shops to open and check the sales, but I'm too lazy to type it in now. I might later.

Let it be enough that I was in so much pain while having an ultrasound done because that bitch dug it in so damn much that I couldn't breathe. She called me fat and told me it was my fault she had to dig this deep. I hope she gets back just as much pain. It's evening already and I hurt so much I hope nothing got seriously hurt. She'd have seen it, right? Right?

Anyway, black and blue spots I have, it's sore and painful. I hate that bitch.

Anyway, mall. I restrained myself pretty well. I bought my dad a pair of felted gloves, because he has lost a pair and I had no idea what to get him for his birthday which will be in a few days.

Then I went to an expensive make-up store, because I had time to kill and drool to spare. I looked through stuff wincing at the prices and sad that they have discontinued my fave lipstick when I saw a sale.

I usually prefer Art Deco and Burjois lipstick when I have to look decent. It's not an everyday wear for me because it's way too expensive, although I usually buy stuff during sales. Like today.

So I bought a Bourjois lipstick. It's shiny. Not exactly metallic, like the ones I usually prefer. It doesn't really have a colour (sable fin #2), it's more of a nude colour with a shiny dust inside. Very pretty. And it was on sale too! (See picture. Sadly, you can't see how shiny it is.)

When I got home and checked up on the lipstick, it turned out it also has Shea butter in it, so it's a double win, not to mention that it has a small mirror on the top of the cap, so I won't have to carry a mini mirror with me either. Now I'm thinking of buying the violet colour as well. Although I'm still not sure if that colour would suit me at all. It's just that I love the colour violet very very much. ><

I also got myself a thin, 50cm long silver necklace, a double link chain. Very pretty, very elegant and it was 60% off. It also has a warranty, not to mention a handsome little jewelry box! Somehow, sometimes it's nice when you get money from your family to buy your own Christmas presents at the after Christmas sales. Thanks for the necklace and the lipstick grandma and grandpa. ^^

"The heart dies a slow death,
shedding each hope like leaves.
Until one day there are none.
No hopes.
Nothing remains."

Anyway.
I've watched The Memoirs of a Geisha. It left me wanting. To kill someone.

I'm not an otaku, or at least I don't think I am. I know little details of other cultures, so it's not like I have a select country I'm too much into. (And I know much more about English-speaking countries, so it's a moot point.) But what they did to geisha... it's a bloody massacre.

First and foremost the geisha, most of the pretty ones were played by Chinese actresses. WTF?! Geisha are Japanese and should be played by Japanese. I do not care how pretty and awesome the Chinese actresses are, this is a movie about Japan and geisha for god's sake! No offense, but I believe that was one of the two biggest, most horrid of flaws of this abomination of a movie.

Second: Geisha are not whores. They don't sell their virginity. They don't sell sex. With this ritual of selling a geisha's virginity to the highest bidder in the abomination, they made the geisha look like common prostitutes. In Japanese culture there is a definite distinction between the geisha and the prostitutes. Geisha are companions, they are educated in many things, music, literature, dance, etc. They are not to be slept with, ever. Prostitutes (well, some of them) do doll themselves up to look like geisha, but they do sleep with the customers. Also, their obi is tied on the front, and for the geisha it's tied on the back.

I do not have a geisha fetish. I think their make-up looks silly and the hairstyles are not to my liking either, but I do have a sort of "wow, that's nice" feeling for them. They are educated women and not whores. That I do like. And that is what the movie sullied and got dead wrong.

Therefore I understand completely why the Asian reception was so bad. Not to mention, that the protagonist geisha had such a sour expression on her face most of the time I have no idea why the scarred faced guy even bothered with the wench. Customers do not like a sour face, ever. This would have been the worst disaster if it really happened. Personally, I'd have slapped her a few times just to make sure she had something to be sour-faced about. Jesus, what horrid customer-service!

What else... Oh yeah. I wonder how the "Mother" had such fine hair at that age. They kinda forgot that geisha, due to that amount of wax and hair twisting and pulling develop a bald spot after a while, so older geisha are bald at the top of their head. I sure as hell wouldn't be able to make such fine and elaborate bun for the retired geisha from the hair that would have remained at her age.

Also, visuals could have been much better. It lacked in both visuals and storyline, not to mention the big pile of crap it deposited on Japan and geisha in general. It was the American Dream rearing its ugly head in Japan of all places. Shoot that movie dead to get it out of it's misery.

Give me absolute control
over every living soul
And lie beside me, baby,
that's an order!

In retrospect, this has been probably my best Christmas ever. In a few years anyway. If I fail to recall the pain.

I mean I had peace and quiet, nobody bugged me much, I could sleep whenever I wanted and I didn't have to visit relatives, the biggest plus ever.

The downside? On wednesday, as in Dec 23 I fell sick. My mom gave me her virus, and while she coughed, I had a very sore throat with yellow spots. On the 24th I felt like dying. On the 25th we went to the ER and got some meds.

The sad thing is, that when I went out to watch Avatar it was -10°C. Next day it was 10°C. After that, 18,5°C. By then I was seriously ill. I just missed the good weather because I got sick. ><

Although it was so nice to open the shutters and let the sunshine in and sleep all day yesterday. I have forgotten how nice it is to sleep in sunshine. I think it lifted my mood enough and I feel better. Not much better, but I'll have enough strength (hopefully) to be able to go to my appointment at the doc on the 29th.

Note to anybody who might ask me: no, I'm not fully recovered, please do not plan on asking me to a new year's party. I will be safely tucked away under covers this new year's again.

Avatar

I enjoyed it. I actually did, even though I saw it in 3D and it was blurry and for 2 hours I felt like throwing up. Motion sickness. Never again 3D movies, thanks.

The plot was reused and even though most of the time I could tell with almost pinpoint accuracy what would happen, I didn't care, because I enjoyed the movie. The visuals were top notch and simply awesome.

And here there be spoilers.

Because I had some issues with Avatar. Observations, mostly. Here is the list of plot holes, minor annoyances, wtfs.

• The avatars are grown as a whole errr... person. How come they are full navii/human hybrids and vegetables from the beginning?
  
  
• No press. I would expect tons of reporters and whatnot to camp out next to the base to document what is going on. I mean if that mineral is so important, how come nobody is writing about it? I mean the boss is deadly afraid of the press but there is no press. At all.
  
  
• The Na'vii accept err... Jake. Sure, there are these "signs", but surely nobody ever would embrace an enemy like that. Oh well. Had to be done for the good of the movie.
  
  
• Alien sex. Apparently they do it the same old way we do. What a killjoy.
  
  
• Those connector thingies that come out of the tip of their braids. What the hell are those and how come they are universal and fit everything? It's kinda disconcerting, not to mention how come they are in their braids. Or are they braids at all? Anyway, it'd be more believable that they have sex with the help of those thingies than the usual way. Oh well.
  
  
• It's rather convenient that the Na'vii can transport the consciousness of Jake, our hero,into his avatar. Oh well. The hero gets his happy end... and the girl.
  
  
• I had a vague Pocahontas (Disney) feeling throughout the movie. Well... not that vague.
  
  
• LoOk aT aLl ThOsE pRetTy CoLoUrS! Shiny. Very shiny. Everything was fluorescent and shiny and fluorescent and shiny and oh gods, so shiny.
  
  
• The bad guy is apparent from the first moment we meet him. Scary scar depicting him as faulty and horrid, check. Testosterone-full, check. Macho, badass monologue, check. Bottle covey look, check. As promised, he fights until he is shot down. Multiple times. With rockets and poisonous arrows. And a kitty.
  
  
• When the girl... imdb says Neytiri, cradled the fallen body of uh... Jake, Snow White and the 7 little dwarfs flashed before my eyes. I just found it hilarious. But that might just be the lack of sleep, I guess.
  

But yeah, the graphics are breathtaking, even though I twitched like mad, trying to check if I was about to aggro a group of raptors or quetzal or skelk. It felt like I was wandering in Asuran territory in first person with the floating islands overhead. (Guild Wars MMO in case someone had doubts.)

But even though the plot was reused and full of clichés, I liked it. Just like I liked Fifth Element. So... yeah, it's good. Just... make sure you have no motion sickness issues before you watch it in 3D.

-6°C!!!!

That's how cold yesterday evening it was. (And today too btw.) I left home yesterday when it was about -4°C at 15:30 and it went downhill from there.

I had to stop a few times, first to buy vitamins for my ill chinchilla, who of course refuses to take any and then at the Christmas fair at Blaha. I bought a pair of leg warmers, black with purple stripes and warm, above all else. I also bought myself the silliest hat ever. It has ear protectors and is felted inside, so it's extra warm and I can hardly hear anything and has three braids with pom-poms coming out of it. Two from the bottom of the ear protectors and one from the top of the head. As I said, awesomely silly. (On the pic.)

I also bought my dad a hat in manly colours. I intended it to be an indoor hat, since he doesn't have much hair, never had since he was 18, so... It's the most useful gift ever.

Then I went to teach. Where the kiddo was a bit sick and started throwing his toys. He has been doing this for a while, but never before with such accuracy. The sound system survived, but not the glasses of tea on the table. His mom got really upset and had a nervous breakdown right in front of me.

I don't think I've ever felt so uncomfortable in other company than my family. She snarled that I should leave for a while and paid me for my services. I offered to have tea with her and listen. (The kid had been put in his kiddie bed with the bars so he couldn't come out.)

Luckily, I refused to leave (a decision I am now happy I made but at that time I wasn't that sure it was a good idea... at all) and things ended up getting back to normal. The mom calmed down while I played with the kid and explained it to him that his mommy was sad because he ruined his toys - and if he ruined them, he wouldn't have anything to play with. Sometimes I'm not sure it'd be safe for me to have a kid. I'd murder him if he pissed me off. (Just kidding, hopefully.)

Anyway. The dad came home, things calmed down and they wouldn't let me leave until I guzzled down 2dl of red wine. It sure kept me from freezing on the road home (1,5 hours) but boy... it was so damn cold! I'm so happy I bought that hat because that at least kept my head warm. My pretty crocheted hat wouldn't have stood a snowball's chance in hell against that weather.

So today here I sit with a horrid migraine (thanks to yesterday's cold and the cold front), legs warmed by leg warmers and I wonder if my dad really will buy a hat like mine, because it'd be funny. (He wants to. But he said he will pick it out himself. I wonder what colour and style he'll pick...)

About wellness spas and suchlikes

It is the holiday season, and I see more and more ads for "wellness treatments" as awesome Cristmast gifts. I never really considered that as a Christmas gift. I have seen women going to spas and lazing about, getting massages and generally just enjoying a 2 days one night trip to some awesome bathhouse in movies and TV shows, but I never really understood the appeal.

No, I'm lying. I really don't like the idea of it. I mean if anybody wanted to send me to some, I'd decline as politely as possible and keep my dirty words for myself... But really. I never enjoyed lazing about in a bath for half a day, or even running scantily clad to get a massage by some person I've never known. I'm pretty much put off by the whole "wellness trip" idea.

I dunno why exactly. I mean my whole body being ticklish might be one of the reasons. maybe not. I mean those women are always pretty and perfect and let's admit it, no matter how much I've accepted how I look, I'm still not comfortable traipsing around in a swimsuit where people can see me.

So I guess that is one of the main reasons. Women who look good can enjoy getting special treats and look good while they do it. I don't like to show my figure in public so it'd be a living hell for me.

Also, there is the question of "couldn't we spend it on something I like better?" Because I'd be more happy to get a pretty pendant or beads, even a nice shade of lipstick better than that spa treat.

Am I a bad person for disliking wellness treats in general and not being excited by sensual music, massages, nicely scented massage oils, candlelit baths and suchlikes?

(And yes, candlelit baths suck. For one the wax is a bitch to scrape up for another, you can hardly see unless you use up a ton of candles, you splash and they burn out and most of all: I prefer to shower. I wash myself properly and that's that, thanks very much.)

If I really had to pick some sensual overload, I'd pick a nice scented oil burning in my oil burner, jazz playing in the background and me curled up on the couch or the bed with a good book. (And don't forget my spicy tea, because that is vital too!)

So... yeah... that's me in a nutshell. I hate wellness spas and other crap. Sue me.

Hmm... Totally forgot how... shocking Utena is. Of course when the main protagonist is a pink haired girl who likes to save other girls and be a prince herself... and is obviously bisexual... well, you expect some sexual hints. But these obvious sexual hints are not small undertones like I remembered, these are bright red banners, screaming.

I forgot that not just Utena, our protagonist, but everybody else has... non-conformist tastes or wishes. Before I list some, I must repeat that the series is full of complex symbols, hints, and phallic symbols like swords, towers, powerful red sports cars and of the female side I can only remember the roses that run rampant; lots and lots of dewy roses and rose carvings, rose crests... roses everywhere.

And the sexual undertones are just as strong to match the heavily symbol-loaded imagery. I sort of forgot how much sex actually went on in the series. Not on screen of course, never on screen, always and only in hints. But man, those hints...

Although yeah, some of these made me a little less certain I intended to watch Utena any more. It's kinda strange how watching two guys trashing about on the same bed makes me feel a bit iffy. Maybe it was the unrealistic part. I hope I'm not about to become a homophobe. Although I didn't feel iffy when Utena was having fun with the girls... and no, I'm still not interested in girls. I just don't really care.

These are a few screencaps that I felt were... interesting...Male readers, cover your eyes or skip the rest please, unless you prefer guys.

"If it cannot break its egg's shell, a chick will die without being born.
We are the chick. The world is our egg.
If we don't crack the world's shell, we will die without being born.
Smash the world's shell!"

Yup. Started watching it again. I've seen it last years ago. But yesterday I got hit by the urge so hard I had to take my DVDs out and start watching it asap. Actually, today.

Maybe it was the complex symbology I've been craving, or maybe it was that I couldn't remember anymore what it was about. Maybe it was Flashforward's influence, the dead crows, dunno. But I'm gonna watch it. And somehow I enjoy getting lost in the symbology and the metaphors and the delicately dropped hints. Yum!

And if someone still hasn't got the slightest clue: I'm talking about Utena.

The combination of rain, fog, wind and cold is probably one of the most depressing sort of weather I can imagine. (Luckily, it was only a slight wind, not the horrid 100 km/h sort.) That and the most revolting to boot, especially that I had to leave in dark and I had stomach cramps from hell. So yeah, add Aunt Irma to the mix and you have a horrid evening.

To top it off, I wasn't in mood for my usual music and ended up listening to Madonna. And I had but 3 songs of hers on my iPod: Frozen, To Have and Not to Hold and Nothing Really Matters.

Trust me, after listening to those 3 on loop, you're about to slit your wrists any minute.

Why didn't I pick something else? Rain. I was happy my umbrella protected me from half of it. I was freezing, my hands were stiff and icy and I just couldn't care enough to find my iPod under tons of clothing.

Note to self: get some decent Madonna songs on my iPod asap, or better: Morcheeba.

Unseen before

I'm currently reading Sir Terry Pratchett's newest Discworld book, the Unseen Academicals. And I find it lacking, as sad as I am to say.

It seems like the old ones were written for European readers, and this one has been written for an American audience mostly. Why? Simple. Europeans are used to reading books you had to decipher, you had to look a bit deeper to finally get that "aha" moment and for all the pieces to fall together. This book simply lacks it.

Somehow, I feel the characters have been made more... nice, easily understood and there is too much explanation. The hinted relationship between Vetinari and Lady Margalotta is addressed in length, Vetinari is being kind and nice and there are no cloaks and daggers and snide remarks and and and... all the things that kept me on my toes all the time. Now it's all explained as it happens, Vetinari is kind and nice and everything is so very very simple.

I feel like crying! It's like an old childhood dream of mine has been sullied. Pratchett is shedding light on every last little bit of mystery, like the plotting and maneuvering Vetinari is doing to Ankh-Morpork and his strange relationship with "The Dark Lady" Margalotta. There is no suspense, there are no unanswered questions, no mysteries to ponder, no "whodunnit" feeling, nothing!!!

All we get is a goblin in the middle as some half-assed riddle, a few romance novel-esque stories stuffed in, a bunch of wizards running around and Vetinari doing the Machiavelli for the very dumb. It feels like the Discworld version for 5 year olds.

I'm beyond words with despair! I loved the Discworld because it was brilliant, sarcastic, played puns on everything from racism to politics, vampires, zombies and yes, fantasy above all else. What Pratchett made of the elves and pixies was brilliant, absolutely brilliant! But this is nothing anymore. It's like someone crapped into your grandma's priceless antique china bowl. Or better yet, swapped your grandma's priceless antique china bowl for some modern, ugly, misshapen art that's tasteless and useless and said there, it's your bowl, the very same. And it's not.

I wonder if this is because Sir Pratchett's Alzheimer is playing up or because he wants to endear himself to the American public. The idea, that he might be trying to tie up lose ends has crossed my mind, but I'm sure he could have done that better, so no, I don't think so.

I wonder if this was a one-time mistake. If no... I'll be even more sad. But as of today, I'm very, very disappointed.

Oh Yuck!!!

One hour of my life wasted on the most horrid shit ever! I gave in and watched The Disaster Movie. I didn't enjoy any part of it. It was crap, disgusting, dumb, brainless and the most horrid movie I have ever watched. It was worse than The Watchmen! It was worse than Twilight! Even worse in experience than the Twilight book or New Moon. And New Moon was the worst book I've ever read.

If you ever think of watching it, don't. I can watch some shitty stuff, like Epic Movie, but this... this is hundred times worse than Epic movie. Honest. There is no redeeming feature, no new content, no plot, no good jokes, nothing!

It's the worst thing ever. And I spent maybe one hour of my life on this shit. Thank the gods for the fast forward button.

About male minds

When a male friend of mine said the dubious praise: "see, I like you for these things, you're almost like one of the guys and can appreciate geek stuff and boobies " I froze. Seriously, I felt like asking back WTF?!

Days later, I'm still bloody angry.

No, I do not enjoy watching other women's breasts and geek stuff is not limited to guys, a**hat. And before someone mentions that getting pissed off is considered denial... I have a lesbian aunt I like. Both she and her gf are cool and I feel sorry I didn't know about them when I was younger, because I would have liked having more decent people around. I also feel sorry we don't meet up more often. Again, because they are decent people, not like some of my family members I have to meet on a regular basis.

Anyway. If this is not enough, just think about this: do you think if I were lesbian I'd stay in the closet because I gave a damn about what other people thought? Like hell.

So, no. I'm simply heterosexual and I'm not even remotely interested in boobies. My breast size beats almost all anyway, so who the fuck cares about other women's breasts?

Next time anyone suggests anything to do with me and other women's breasts I'll need a shovel and a place to hide a dead body, savvy?