I met Him today.

(*) NOT Jesus or the Christian god, thanks very very much for the insult. (You know who I'm talking about... yes, you!)

Oh my God, I saw Harry Potter's weewee!

Yeah, I can picture the sound of some Potter fans' dreams and ideals shattering in a blink. So many parents looked up to the child hero, and now they see hundreds and thousands of pictures (mostly the same few, but in many places like blogs and so on) of the actor of the Potter boy naked.

Not to mention with a serious horse-fetish. In a play where he plays the role of a deranged pervert (ok, he's only into horses, but seriously...).

Also, I think the play was poorly written. I mean... If you wanna write about a psychological issue, you should do your friggin homework first. But oh well, artists can't be concerned with some little things like that, after all not many psychologists go and watch a play so disturbed and poorly written as that.

Also, I did my homework on the issue and found a few very funny remarks. Here is one so you can all laugh:

"But just dressing up as a schoolboy and earning millions of quid for it wasn't enough for Daniel Radcliffe - he wanted to push himself as an actor. So Daniel Radcliffe did the only thing he could - he decided to play a dead soldier. And nobody paid any attention, so he got naked and stabbed a horse in the eye instead." Link.

I also liked this comment too:
"The clamour to see what Harry Potter's cock Daniel Radcliffe's electrifying stage presence looks like has meant that Equus has taken around £1 million in advance tickets, but it's not all sunshine and monkeys for Equus; anti-smoking groups have lashed at Daniel Radcliffe for smoking a cigarette during the play. And fair's fair - a naked 17-year-old boy mutilating six horses with a spike is really no big deal, but smoking? The sick little fucker." Same link.

Can't say what the play looked like with Potter's dick flopping about the place, but it must have paid off to get little Harry Potter to play the role. I imagine hundreds of Potter fans fighting for tickets to get a look at that floppy little penis. (If you wanna look it up, google pictures of Equus. I don't think it's anything to be extremely proud of, but hey, Potter fans are into it... Well, those that are not flaming him and every Potter site around the world.)

First Potter and then Dumbledore too. Those poor Potter fans are having it this year. Next thing we know it turns out Malfoy is straight! o.O

Amen.

Fuckitall

Today I was at the point of standing up and walking out of the door and never coming back.

What happened exactly? Well while I'm in this training group, we have to write a test every Friday. So far it's all ok. The problem is, that they don't care eitehr way that the computer assigned to me is NOT WORKING. The problem is: the hard drive is full, so applications are not working, such as office and lotus notes (the ones we are constantly using). They could, of course, just go there, delete a few things and then the problem would be solved. Still, they have been unable to do it since Monday. And it is traning group.

So besides me being pissed off by juggled around at different computers and feeling like someone not wanted, I have to wait every time for all the settings to load, because I'm using someon else's computer.

So... about what happened... They started the test while my computer was still logging in. And logging in... and loading... and loading. Nobody cared that only I wasn't able to to log in. I asked them for help again and again, I also asked about the password because I write every traingin password down in my notebook, but they said it shouldn't be among the list and I'll need some special login name.

Nope. When the fucking computer finally logged in, and I found the actual password, it was in the list, the one I pointed out, and my login name was my own login name at the company. (Of course.) I could have murered them then and there.

When I told them it was THAT password, the stupid little bitch just laughed like it was an excellent joke. Yeah, it's much more important to flirt with the other team builder, who is male and incidentally married. She should just ignore us, because it's not really important at all. nah, we are here for 3 fucking weeks to have fun and bathe in the sunshine.

Also, when I had that stupid test program open, I had very little time to solve them all, and all the others were way ahead of me and while they could work together, I couldn't. (It was a test where you had to okay every answer you made so you couldn't go back.)
I was so pissed... I only got 83% because I didn't have time to check them if they were correct, because we were actually allowed to use the programs and see if the solutions in the possible answers worked or not.

And yes, it counts if I get 83% or more, since I have to reach at least 80% to pass the fucking end test.

But... why do I worry? I don't want to work with assholes like them and a company who expects me to be a brainwashed zombie without will, spirit and life. They can kiss my ass.

Men are weird

I hate Mondays. Every Monday something weird or worse happens. Just like today.

Thanks to my 100% test I had to work on the computer that was hooked up with the beamer so I couldn't even play solitaire. Oh joy. It was pure torture until the break.

Then one of my group members proposed to me! o.O It was the natural healer, of course. (The one with the body of a god (not Buddha), long hair, hawkish nose, pretty face and no brains whatsoever. Go me! >.<)

We know each other since last Monday (yup, wrath of Mondays), and he decided he wanted me as his gf. I have absolutely NO clue as of why. Yeah, he mentioned he has a weak personality and he needs a woman with a strong will, but seriously...

Since last Monday I tried to make it clear that I think he's an idiot, a fluke and even worse than a wiccan. (I actually hate wiccans because they mix up the facts. He knows that.) Seriously, the bloke hugs trees as a hobby! (I love trees, I just don't wanna hurt them by crushing their branches, ripping off leaves and kicking out chunks of their roots. I also don't think they like being glomped by people.)

Anyway, I stared at the guy incredulously for a while until he asked me if I was unsure, ok, happy, totally into him or extatic. I counted to 20 and then asked him to run.

He didn't, of course. The little snot has no sense of danger! -.- # So I turned and walked away to drink some strong coffee. And after some time laughed until my break was way over.

What I still don't understand: why do doormats like me? I'm antisocial, blunt, sarcastic and don't care either way. (Even I wouldn't want to date me... ok, mostly because I'm female.) I also like to banter quite a bit, and people with fragile souls tend to take it the wrong way. (Apparently, not these idiots.)

Oh, and I'm an insane guy magnet. Every guy who asked me out turned out to be either insane or loaded with psychological issues. The last one even took enough pills to be called a full-course meal.

But all in all, this guy wins the prize. He's the most infuriating, annoying and maddening one I've ever had the misfortune to spend way too much time with.

And I have to meet him tomorrow too. T.T

Wow... Friday...

Who woulda thunk it would come. Not me, that's for certain. Also, I had to write that stupid test for work. Got 100%. The bastards called me to stand up and bask in the glares of all who didn't.

Ok, joking, they were clapping, but it was even worse. It's just sickening. It had a "you others are so stupid, you should have written a 100% test too" feeling to it.

Actually, I seriously dunno why they still want us to remain in this team building madness. We don't even belong to the same department, for gods' sake! We speak different languages besides Hungarian, and there is also the Russian girl... Ok, never mind her, she's just strange. You know... I like her better because of it.

They also lied to my face, and even when I told them I know it was bull, they stood by it. I hoped to get reprimanded or get fired, but alas, no such luck. I was told "that's it, deal with it".

What I did was as follows: turned my back on them, got antisocial with a little group of same-minded antisocials and took turns to tell each other jokes and refused to talk to the others, because... we were breaking the system.

Fave joke of the day: In what way are having sex in a boat and alcohol-free beer alike? The answer: they are both f*cking close to water. (This joke actually made my day and lifted my spirits quite a bit. I'm easily amused, so sue me.)

Also, now I have 22 mushrooms, 15 dragonflies, 8 frogs, about 6 copies of the matrix twins, countless fallen leaves, hundreds of comic strips and a handful of haikus adorning the pages of my notebook. I'm running out of mushroom types I know, so I'll look some new ones up.

...I drew a huge flying saucer race as well. The fallen spoon is the runner up.

Rock Bottom

Today, I was coming home when I started hysterically sobbing while standing in the bus stop. Which is a first for me. It also came out of the blue. Well... mostly. I was thinking about what to do: reading a book, getting something to eat, getting some net-time or going to sleep. I only have one choice, since I'll have to wake up early to get to the team horror in time.

I scared a little old lady half to death, but I quickly told her it was "nothing serious" and that I was just tired and sad. Bless her poor heart.

I'd like to think today could be considered hitting rock bottom. Both of my parents are begging (ok, urging) me to tell the bloody jerks off (my mother) and leave the company asap (my dad).The day was long, our few minutes of break nonexistent, as in group hugs and complimenting each other is much more important than a toilet break, getting a coffee or getting a breath of fresh air.

I was very close to just standing up, walking out and never coming back. I also have to thank the designers for those windows because I was contemplating jumping out... But of course I couldn't. (Which is a good thing, because I'd have died of shame again... come on, it's so cliché and weak...)

Seriously, this is quite enough abuse I have taken. They treat us like animals. If it happened in India, I'd say yes, they are bastards, and sadly it happens. But I thought we belong to Europe, and it was illegal to work someone near to death. Also, there are rules about certain types of work and breaktime... Seems like they are not privy to it. (Hmmm, perhaps I should report them...)

Anyway. Plan is to either work until I get the sum of money for the table I fancied since I saw it (about 2 weeks worth of my future salary), or until I can not bear to go in anymore. Either way, my folks are miraculously standing behind me. (That's a first!) So, I want that table, because then I could say it was worth it, or at least I got something real nice out of it.

I see the walking dead

What the title said. Since I started working for a multinational company, I'm utterly zombified. They think it's a good idea to stick a bunch of people into a room and not letting them out only for break (if we get a break) and of course sleep for 3 weeks. They call it team building. Every sane person calls that torture.

Of course, they also forgot that we are not Americans. Hungarian people are more temperamental, cling on to their personality like mad and refuse to give in.

Also, locking us into a room for a long period of time means half the team shall leave in body bags. Hungarians are NOT team players. We can try to be, but we need space and time away from each other. (Which actually kills the team idea.) Only someone utterly mad could think all types of people are good for this team building crap. ('scuse my Klatchian.)

Truth be told, I'm only in for the money (as I'd prefer to leave the nest and get out of the family home asap), and to observe who the first dead body will be. (My bet is on our "natural healer", and the weapon involved in the murder shall be an axe if I manage to buy one in time. If not, the next time he says something he obviously saw on a Chinese fortune cookie, I'm going to throttle the little snot.)

Have I mentioned that I hate to be humiliated and called names? If not, I shall do it now. Those bastards are doing it... What they are doing is similar to holding out a dozen of coins, showing them to homeless people and trying out how far you can go in humiliating them before they say it's not worth it, and leave.

The Flipside

So... I'm done with the hysterical sobbing, long hot bath and hair washing... I can say I feel at least remotely human again.

The job sucks. The training sucks more.

I landed in a training team session, which will last for 3 bloody weeks, where I won't be taught ANYTHING even close to the things I'll need at work. (Since my group doesn't do what others are doing.)

Actually, I was told I'd be doing IT help desk stuff. That's a load of bull. Then I got told I'll be answering e-mails. That's also bull, and a big one. The real job will be getting e-mails full of data which I'll have to copy into slots, with a program that does stuff like that, and send them away.

It's like the Cinderella job. They throw everything at us and we select these things into separate groups and send them on their way.

But that's not all. We will have to do follow-up, poke the tech guys to do their jobs, arrange things, bug technicians again, do some more follow up like asking if the tech guys did show up and worked their magic or not... if not, rinse and repeat. Oh, and get yelled at.

The breaks are as follows: 4x10 minutes and 1x45 mins for 8 hours. While I have to look at the computer. Rules say I should be allowed 10 mins after every hour, but oh hey, who cares. We are slaves of a multinational bull. Yeehaaa!

Have I mentioned it's an American company? Have I mentioned... Texas? If not, pardon me dahling, I must have had a raw, bloody cow in me mouth... *whimper*

Oh, and I met my future coworkers today. One of them looks like a drunkard, who chain smokes, forced us trainees to smoke with her (Hello, I have asthma!) and she told us she comes in 2 hours earlier and leaves as the last. Huzzah. (Incidentally, you won't get paid if you work overtime.)
The other guy we met and talked with had chewed on looking pullover, baggy clothes... I mean he was... thin, had an insane glint in his eyes, talked way too much with lotsa gestures and had a strange fascination with his fallen-out hairs... he also tore them into little bits. Nice hobby, innit?

Oh, and a few words about the guys (2) who are with me in the training.
One of them is a philosopher. He looks like my ex. Tall, blond, ruggedly handsome, baby-blues... he's a tad bit thinner... Also, he dresses nicely. He's very intelligent too, kind of a loner.
I thought he was really hot. Then he giggled. He came up with some insane idea as dressing up like a mummy on "casual Fridays" and started giggling. I shit you not. He friggin giggled... loudly and long. He did it a few times... he turned us way off.

Other guy... He walked in on the first day, and I fell in love with him. He looked like the hottest guy ever. Long dark hair, hooked nose, deep blue eyes, tall, body like a god (not Buddha), pale white skin... He also has a band and is the singer...
And then he talked and he sounded like one of my worst personal nightmares. He is a natural therapist (or whatshisname), has worked with "magick", actually does not know what wiccans are but he is one, hugs trees for a hobby, is a slobbery romantic idiot and lives with his mother. Also a blazing idiot. He only eats health food - or so he says -,but had absolutely no trouble eating junk food with us on the first day. Add hypocrite to the growing list.

Oh, and they also got me, a certifiable insane madwoman who dabbles in the occult, act like a maniac and has issues. Also do not forget the hysterics and the antisocial problems of mine. Sounds like a team. Not.

Oh Gods, whoever is listening, please save me, and I shall worship you. (I'm not killing people tho', just to be clear about it.)

Death by Cosplay

I got linked a few "cosplay" images. (Costume play, for those ignorant people who have not delved into the insanity of anime-maniacs. It means dressing up as some character. *shudder*)

And you know what? I'd make it punishable by law for females to dress up as males and vice versa. Seriously, it's just plain disturbing.

It's kinda iffy looking at guys in open shirts and see boobies sticking out. (I'd also get it punishable by law to post them on the net and anyone who saves them should be shot to death in the middle of the undecent act that follows it up. I think I have too many perverted friends.)

You know... the whole dressing up thing should be punishable by law save for halloween and the carnival season. It'd save much money and sanity.

Seems like I got the job. Thanks for all who had their fingers crossed for me.

The job: I'll have to work from the afternoon to late in the evening.
The pay sounds great, the work hours (so far) acceptable, but not preferable.

Drawback: I'll have t woprk on national holidays that are not holidays in the USA. The company is very much into the USA. Oh well. I'll have to really hold my tongue.


Only question is: when exactly will I work. If they want me to stay so long that I'll miss my last bus (they actually said I'll end my shift around 22:00, last bus leaves at 23:15, so I'd get there in time) I'll start to have issues. And I can have issues rather loudly.

Anyway, we shall see, and let's hope for the best.
Also, let's hope there will be no hidden bad side to this work.